A G.I. Joe mentality in a Barbie world
Rush! Energy Drink seems to be the only energy drink on the market that is trying to reach out to the Latino population. I know this because of the dual language messages on the can. I, for one, am glad to say I that now, when I hear someone say agua carbonatada, sorbato de potasio, and cafeina on my Spanish language soap operas, it will reveal a great deal more about the plot to me.
Figuro Uno dot uno: El Rusho!
The claims of the can: Aside from the exclamation point, which as we all know indicates bone-crunching excitement, it also invites you to “excite your senses” (“estimule sus sentidos“) and informs you regretfully that the product “contains no fruit juice (“no contiene jugo de frutas“).
Scariest-sounding ingredient: “Pyridoxine Hydrochloride” (“Hidrocloruro de Piridoxina“)
Energy Drink Funk Factor: 1. It tastes like a cherry Dum Dum. I love this shit. (Yo amor esta mierda.)
What it does for you: With a healthy dose of caffeine, sugar, B-vitamins, and a bunch of other shit that sounds very energy-arousing, I felt like I was fucking tweaking. Just drink half a can, trust me.